Being a father of 3 has taught me more about how to forgive and love my dad. I'm a very confident person on the outside, but inside like most people I am living for the approval of people I trust. There is nothing wrong with this from God's perspective. We were made to be in relationships that are enjoyable, at peace, where we approve of one another in reasonable ways. There should be a KNOWing in close relationships that involves a large degree of acceptance, love, grace for faults, tension in the struggles and the like.
Being a father of 3 has taught me how hard it was to raise me, and how much grace and love I have been given and continue to receive from my parents, my wife, kids, friends, colleagues, clients and neighbors.
Wherever you are in your relationship with your parents, it may be helpful to decide to go on the journey toward KNOWing them better, toward healing. Some however should not, those who have been abused, lied to or otherwise where the relationship was destroyed through sin, should perhaps not continue. In this life, there will be many broken relationships and some are not worth continuing because they will not be able to honor God or one another.
Deciding where you are on this spectrum is important, God, in the bible clearly explains how vital the relational fabric of fathers to children is to the health of a nation and culture, and even more so to understanding who God is outside of the biblical evidence. In other words, having good, godly parents sets up everyone for a godly, peace and joy filled life. For every degree that fathers and parents move away from God's design there is an exponential increase for distortions of what is good.
Healing and growth always start with the presence of God among men. Do you believe God is with you now? Do you believe God is with you and those you know? Do you seek His presence during. the good and bad situations? Do you KNOW him in the joy and pain? Are you fully KNOWN?
Father, my Father, in heaven
You are HOLY, I and my father are not HOLY like you
We are broken and forgiven, frail and strong, living and dying toward forever
We look to you and want to be KNOWN so that we be fully free to love others as you love us.
In Jesus, Amen